C.T. at the entrance to Dachau.
‘A race that rejects Him will surely perish!’ —Matt Koehl
Without having read Hellstorm, the darkest hour for the white race will never be understood (book-review here). If you’ve already read it, check out ‘The Wall’.
Editor’s note: Below, some excerpts from pages 184-199 of the expanded, August 2024 edition of Benjamin’s The Less Than Jolly Heretic:
______ 卐 ______
Dear César,
I hope you are well. Congratulations on the completion of the Savitri Devi book project. I’ve already downloaded a digital copy and read through it once. I was wondering if it was now possible to place an order for one of your home-bound editions? If you could tell me the full costs, I shall put the money through to you. I did not want to contact you until now as I wanted to make sure I was financially secure enough to afford the process and shipping costs…
I’m also aware that, sadly, the vast majority of “right-wing” individuals and the groups they cluster to are extremely hostile to manifestations of psychological pain, and ignorant over trauma, and with a particular recent drive to ridicule mental health for the purposes of ‘defeating’ their political ‘leftist’ rivals. As you wrote before, I consider them to be fakes. To be honest, you’re the only National Socialist I have ever encountered online who is at all understanding of madness…
I see nigh-on all these committed White political activists as just as much of a threat as everyone else. If there ever were to achieve substantial power, I would not expect them to impose an order in any way relatable to the worldview of National Socialism, or of any genuine intrinsic loyalty to the great vision of Adolf Hitler, or indeed the West itself…
Occasionally, I’ll check Counter Currents, maybe once every few months. I always regret it. Of all of them, I had expected more of ‘Morgoth’. I saw this today by Stephen Paul Foster. Immediately I was put off but decided to see what he had to say. I paused on the lines:
My friend, whose name was Bill, was not your typical loser who works himself into a violent temper and up and slays his defenseless girlfriend. This particular slayer turned out to be a man of advanced degrees, sophisticated tastes, serious books, and immense erudition. Fluent in four languages, the range and depth of his knowledge was phenomenal. He could converse insightfully about the influence of Kantian ethics on German legal positivism, help you fathom the aesthetics of Arnold Schoenberg’s atonalism, and substantively compare English translations of the pre-Socratic philosophers.
I knew he was hopelessly lost in relativism, ignorance and Christian moral outrage. Even culturally, we could do better than Schoenberg and Kant. Might as well be Bukowski, or at least their Hemmingway. He wrote:
In his trial for the second murder, to convince the jury that Bill’s torture and killing of his girlfriend was not a first degree (capital) murder, his attorneys summoned as defense witnesses “theorists of the mind”—psychologists—to compound the “assumptions” that would explain Bill’s evil; abstractions conjured out of the black box of “mental health” in the form of “disorders” .
Much as I don’t agree with the orthodox medical system or with the term “disorders” either, it seems like Stephen was unwilling to accept that Bill’s behaviour was in any way explainable beyond him being pure evil. I’m not sure how one could ever satisfactorily attempt to pass that off as an intelligent response. He even wrote immediately afterwards, using Poe as an authority, of all people:
By undue profundity, we perplex and enfeeble thought. — Edgar Allan Poe, The Murders in the Rue Morgue
He goes on:
The trial was a formal ritual of “undue profundity.” It attempted to factor in of all of Bill’s personal paraphernalia that had been relevant to the murder. But pondering his potential, intelligence, educational attainment, cultured charm, and his sick, unhappy childhood with divorced parents and a callous father was worse than useless as an effort to explain the elusive why he did what he did. Some people are just no good. It is that simple. They are unredeemable. They belong in Dante’s tenth and lowest circle of Inferno. The more assumptions introduced to explain it, the more confusing (perplexing) it becomes, and less satisfactory the results.
Considering what I said in my previous email, where I was pondering what the Dissident Right would be like in a position of power, this line troubled me:
Stupidity cannot be fixed; neither can evil. Yet, while everyone concedes that stupidity is impossible to remediate, many think that evil is an accident or a breakdown that can be repaired by “experts.”
Great, so first some people are just evil, fundamentally, and no further questions needed, and then we discover that they are also unable to repair from this. I am left wondering what they would propose to do, given this strange superstition. I can understand Bill’s sentencing, and I am not attempting to excuse the acts. However, I can see Stephen potentially applying this mantra further. He seems to be rationalizing for what is—in the near-synonymous to this wording of his own article—a fear of new knowledge. There is the voice of the Elizabethan witch-hunter in him. At what point does his pathetic Christian moralizing stop? What would prevent him expanding his definition of evil? I shudder to think how he would react to mental health in general. I was thinking of the case of Jeffrey Dahmer at the time, and the pieces you wrote on his case. [Editor's note: See e.g., here and here] It’s terrible, but now understandable. I am able to feel pity and sadness all round, knowing it was not dealt with in time.
After all, in the original entry in the un-updated blog he linked here Stephen wrote:
His personal history was indeed a remarkable departure from that of the typical slayer of ex-girlfriends: marks of social and economic privilege, impressive educational credentials, extraordinary intellectual attainment. Bill’s life had been considerably advantaged. His father was a highly successful attorney, first in St Louis, then in California.
He went on:
This man had been my friend for fifteen years. We met when he was a first year law student at St Louis University in 1982. I was a librarian at the law school, teaching part time and finishing a dissertation for a Ph. D. in philosophy. Bill worked as a student in the law school library and after a couple of initial encounters we became friends. Few friendships in my life formed so quickly and with such intensity, in part because we shared a passion for systematic and voracious historical and philosophical reading.
Additionally, I noted the sentence:
To me Bill had always appeared completely normal, even conservative in his personal habits, orientation and behavior.
Then, tellingly:
How could this extraordinary man I had known for so long and for whom I had so much affection, commit such horrible crimes? … How could I not over the years have seen any indications that he was capable of such murderous fits of rage? Did my friendship mean anything genuine to him, or was I a kind of social prop who served a darker pathological purpose? Was there a flaw in my character not to have recognized the malignancy in his?
I was vindicated when I read the lines:
…the attorneys also painted a picture of Bill for the jury that bore little resemblance to the person I had known for so many years. They said Bill was a socially inept, maladjusted loner, a man who had been irreparably damaged by an indifferent and emotionally distant father. About his upbringing I have no direct knowledge, but I do remember over the years how consistently he spoke with respect and admiration of his father
[emphasis by Ed. - cf. the Dahmer case], particularly his basic decency and integrity.
The conclusion I drew from this was that Stephen was awed by Bill’s intelligent and academic nature, which was in fact all that really seems to have interested him, and he did not indeed know Bill that well, or a great deal about Bill’s father either, bar more credentialism, having never had the compassion or emotional intelligence to notice any warning signs of repressed psychological pain. Rather than a fairy-tale “evil,” I am concerned reading that he is so overcome with righteous rage at the crimes against two women that he cannot bear to wonder more about Bill’s childhood experiences with his father.
All he notes is Bill’s successes and erudition. I find the presumption terrible. Given the way you have exposed in your writings and links how much abuse victims idolize their abusive parents, and how the self-repressive mentality of continuing to do so is a sure-fire route to them taking out their rage on others, I thought it was not unbelievable that this indeed was the cause of Bill’s horrific criminal actions.
Rather than soaking up facts about Schoenberg and feeling smug in having a charming token ‘highly intelligent friend,’ perhaps Stephen could have listened to him, or had the perception to see between the lines. Despite his PhD in philosophy, his argument seems to stem more from his livid social embarrassment at having been ‘caught out’, especially on account of the fact that he seems to have considered Bill a good catch, almost as a vicarious academic status booster, basking in the glow of his knowledge, and yet another very able scholar himself, perhaps observable now, given his protestive elucidation, this sounder moral quality, rising.
In a nutshell, this is generally the sort of reason I keep clear of Counter Currents and the Dissident Right. They infuriate me.
Well, I’m off to lift my weights and prepare some soup, I shall look forward to ordering your bound translation next week. I hope you have a good day.
15 March 2023
quotes from The Less Than Jolly Heretic: The Philosophy of Hurt Children and An Adult’s Transvaluated Moral Principle by Benjamin:
______ 卐 ______
The term “Neochristian” is perhaps most appropriate. It is a slightly different consideration that takes European racial history into account in detail beyond mere latter-day political manipulation and propagandizing, an understanding that does not pass off this issue as mere leftist ‘brainwashing.’
After all, in the words of an anonymous commenter I discovered online through the West’s Darkest Hour blog in 2024 (a highly detailed and beautifully erudite online academic resource where one will, doubtlessly, have one’s core assumptions shaken), “liberalism itself, and its factional development into the likes of Marxism, Bolshevism, Fabian Socialism, and Fourierism is merely a repurposing of Christian ethical values, the ‘catholic,’ i.e., universalist dogmas of egalitarianism that inspired Boasian anthropology, and the genuflection, self-abnegation, and self-abasement that function as necessary prerequisites for spiritual purity, the public display of self-hate coupled to penitent virtue-signaling, the Christian doctrine of original sin synonymous with modern white guilt and the moralizing over privilege, and political correctness no different to judgments of heresy, witch-hunting, and ex-communication, with government replacing God as an omnipotent benefactor.”
He goes on, in my mild paraphrasing: “Even as the original religious belief in a supreme Jewish deity and an afterlife dies, the inverted value system remains, self-policing and condemning other tribal kin as heretics and infidels and working against their family interests, a meek, self-defeating, pacifist transvaluation of traditional moral values, replacing the pre-Christian aristocratic values that inspired a love of strength, pride, honour, loyalty, family, tradition, and race with weakness, mediocrity, conformity, and vulgarity, stripping all self-worth, severing connections to ancestry and genetic memory, rendering intellectual curiosity and critical thinking a sinful threat and stimulating a culture that holds contempt for learning, learned helplessness and conditioned group obedience, the slave-like underclass of society weaponized to resent, judge and police the behaviour of the warrior and aristocratic castes, and a hyper-political polarization.”
The commenter (whose extended quotation is sadly unlocated by me at the time of writing this so I am unable to provide a proper acknowledgement) ends his share of prudent wisdom with the acknowledgement that “Christianity itself has always been an institutionalized, self-regulating millenarian slave-morality system promoted as a religion, shaping the evolutionary group strategy of Europeans for almost two thousand years. These values are handed down from parents to children, and all modern patterns of perception, logic, speech, thought, action, and emotional response operate subconsciously within the dynamics of this system”, irrespective of an increasingly anti-theistic secularity since the 18th Century. [pages 10-11 of the Third Edition, 2024]
——- * * * ——-
I generally find I have absolutely nothing in common with those I observe and read who are designated “Far Right” by the establishment or, indeed, self-defined as “White Nationalists.” As examined at length above, then, I am vastly more interested in the close Nordic phenotypical similarities of the Cro-Magnon settlers who migrated to Europe from the Anatolian peninsula of Western Asia at the end of the Middle Palaeolithic than in rooting our racial origins in the early Bronze Age.
There’s the superficial appearance of a relationship with the dissident right, but it remains a shallow, lazy analysis. I have little interest in the right’s incessant and fallacious genetic determinism theorising. I find the political right appallingly crass, boorish, and ignorant in general, more an example of insincere, ratings-sensitive showmanship than a force for any active change, and I can’t imagine I’d integrate too well with any of their peer groups, even if I somehow wanted to. They seem to remain as rooted in the orthodoxy as every other branch of political activists across the spectrum, or indeed the apolitical citizen majority, the same insular, bourgeois attitudes, and those cruel moralizing values of what unfortunately amounts to the 99%. [Ibid., page 128]
——- * * * ——-
You might also have to come to terms with the uncomfortable realities of Nordicism. Suppose you can’t even admit that your recent ancestors ended the world and are to be held accountable for this. In that case, you’re going to have problems announcing that those of them before that violated your racial phenotypes also, corrupting your genetics through poor mate choices – and some considerable way back. Genetics (or archaeogenetics) is often a superficial excuse. Just look at your exterior forms, your faces and bodies, their minds and actions. You’re dung. There, I can see some conservative type getting offended at me now.
As I wrote before, I don’t relate well to White Nationalists and right-wing thinkers, the discrete ‘national supremacists’ of England and America, as I call them. I see the communistic Athenian democracy of their massed online alternative media forums, and I have no respect for – or interest in – their proud, cruel, egalitarian conservatism, that brutish bourgeois capitalism and psychiatric Neochristianity, always the resolute pacifism and the scolding of braver men. [Ibid., pages 194-195]
I want to expand on what I discussed yesterday with Benjamin about the trauma model of mental disorders because the topic is a universal taboo, including in the racialist community, to the point that catastrophes like those of William Pierce and Don Black’s children are incomprehensible. (My working hypothesis is that, had they been treated well as children, they would have followed in their parents’ footsteps instead of betraying their ideals.)
It all has to do with the omnipresent taboo, and I’d like to illustrate it with the first reading I ever did of a mental health professional who, unlike bio-reductionist psychiatry, which is pseudoscientific, was one of the pioneers in talking about parents who schizophrenized their children.
Theodore Lidz
It was 1983 when I was broke precisely because of the abuse I had suffered at home the previous decade. At the famous Gandhi Bookstore in Mexico City, I read the interview with Dr Theodore Lidz in the book Laing and Anti-Psychiatry, edited by Robert Boyers and Robert Orrill. Back then, there were no comfortable armchairs like those found in Barnes & Noble bookstores, and I had to read that long interview standing up because the subject fascinated me. It was the first time in my life I had read someone who came close to what I believed had happened in my family.
Seven years later, I managed to buy a copy of Boyers and Orrill’s book, translated into Spanish by Alianza Editorial of Madrid, which was the same edition I had read at the Gandhi Bookstore. Since I don’t have the original English version, I can’t quote a passage from the interview with Lidz verbatim, but I can restate its content.
When the interviewer asked if Lidz was surprised that books on schizophrenia, like those by Ronald Laing, had become popular among young people (this is a 1971 book and reflected the mood of the 1960s), Lidz replied that he was surprised that Laing wrote for the general public and not for a professional audience. What struck me as I reread that interview yesterday was that Lidz added that it wasn’t the public’s business to know what happens in these families, even though Laing might have altered the details to make his cases anonymous. Lidz added that, in his work on cases of schizogenic parents—that is, those who drive their children mad—he wasn’t able to publish the reports of most of the families because some of the parents were quite well-known, and even with pseudonyms, they could have been recognised. He added that some of the cases ran to 50 to 80 typewritten pages, ‘truly precious documents’, but that they couldn’t be published.
This struck me greatly because in my Letter to Mom Medusa, I cite a case in which Lidz violated what he said above: the case of Mrs Newcomb (a pseudonym) and her extremely passive husband, who helped me so much in understanding my parents.
On the next page I reread yesterday, Lidz, with whom I spoke on the phone in the 1990s when he was already quite old, surprised me again because he wrote that he didn’t believe the schizogenic parents had done anything wrong; that they hadn’t meant to harm the child, and that this contrasted with what Laing wrote, for whom the parents’ intentions were often malicious. Lidz added, and here I retranslate it again from my Spanish copy into English, that ‘parents do the best they can—they can’t be different from what they are’.
This goes against the thesis of my autobiographical books, where I say that my father could have chosen the good: not to be influenced by the lies his wife told about me, but rather should have communicated with me in my adolescence (cf. both the final pages of Hojas Susurrantes and the first chapter of ¿Me Ayudarás?).
It’s been forty-two years since I first read the very lucid interview with Lidz standing in the Gandhi Bookstore, an interview that was a turning point in the research I did on my parents. It’s only natural that after so many years, my thinking has matured, largely due to the work of Alice Miller: the first psychologist in history who, unlike her predecessors (like Lidz), unequivocally took the side of the victimized child. (Despite what Lidz said, Laing didn’t completely side with the victim either, as we see in the middle chapter of my Hojas Susurrantes.)
In the previous thread, Benjamin complained that the racial right couldn’t care less about the issue, to which I responded that the German woman who received the mantle after Alice Miller died said that blaming parents is the most potent taboo in the human psyche. I’m posting this entry because, I see now, the taboo was present even in the works of my admired mentors, whom I read decades ago. The abysmal difference between them and us is that, in siding with the victim, we don’t care about what Lidz and company feared: that the public would realise which families the clinical material refers to, those ‘truly precious documents’ he didn’t dare publish (and which would have done enormous good for our cause had they been published!).
Do you now understand the new literary genre that people like John Modrow, Benjamin and I want to inaugurate? By siding a hundred per cent with the victim, not only do we not care about people recognising the abusive families, but we write using their real names!
Only revenge heals the wounded soul, even though we’re talking about literary revenge.
‘The kind of society you want to create, Christianity makes impossible’.
—Alex Linder
in memory of the German war dead
Only thanks to the help of an old friend, who offered me his house as storage, yesterday I managed to save the furniture that accompanied me in my home during my childhood and adolescence. Now I need to complete the long bureaucratic process to rent a modest flat in a decent area of the capital.
While I settle in, a helpful way to spend the time would be to listen to this poem, and also these audio clips from Benjamin’s books.
Being a ‘man against his time’ not only means revaluing the values regarding the heroic National Socialists who died in the war, but also inverting them equally when it comes to other lies accepted by society—such as psychiatry and what really causes mental disorders.
If the racialists understood what Benjamin and I have written in our autobiographical books, things like the grotesque betrayal of Don Black’s son, or the betrayal of William Pierce’s son, wouldn’t have happened; and I dare say David Irving’s daughter wouldn’t have become schizophrenic.
It’s time for contemporary racialists to stop believing the System’s lies (psychiatry is taught in every medical school). A good way to do so is to start familiarising onseself with the literature of those of us who have survived truly hellish adolescences.
by Gaedhal
Eradica used to have a saying: the daily outrage. Grifters such as Sargon of Akkad have found a way to monetise the daily outrage. Similarly with redpill and manosphere content: they have found a way to monetize the daily outrage. This is why I cut outrage-bait from my feed. However, new sources of outrage bait continually crop up, as baiting outrage is an extremely lucrative endeavour.
What is missed in all of this is that the Christian Churches in Ireland, North and South—when we subtract the Levantine Hocus Pocus and blood-magic Voodoo from them—are simply just government funded NGOs who advance the Great Replacement. It was the Roman Catholic Church and Sister Stan who set up the Irish Immigrants’ council. The Catholic angle in all of this is conveniently ignored by Catholic Nationalists such as John McGuirk and Niamh Nic Mathúna.
GRIPT has links to Roman Catholic Youth Defence and the Catholic Nationalist family the McMahons—or, unpronounceably, the Mac Mathúnas. But the Roman Catholic Church is the biggest NGO, in Ireland, that is behind the plantation.
I personally, do not agree with “debates” such as this, as it sends out the signal that the 14 words are up to debate, that we can only advance the 14 words, if we “win” debates such as these. Similarly, I don’t agree with electioneering, as the 14 words does not depend upon a majority of the mob, in a rigged system, agreeing with us.
One of the reasons why I am not a democrat is just the effeminacy of the thing. Genocides—population displacement is genocide—and invasions such as these are not repelled by debates and electioneering. Voting harder has never once repelled a genocide or an invasion. Muh debates has never once repelled a genocide or an invasion. And if the white Irish are too stupid cowardly and effeminate to realise this then they deserve to go extinct. Ultimately nature is fair. Nature might be so cruel that it is impossible for any Classically theistic gods to exist, however Nature is fair.
Nature has given white men several opportunities in the past to adhere to the laws of nature and to dominate the entire planet. White men have squandered every single one of these opportunities. The white race has committed this sin against the Holy Ghost countless times, against nature, and yet nature is more forgiving than Rabbi Jesus, and instead of consigning us to the flames of total societal destruction, has forgiven us and given us more and more chances.
But even Nature’s patience will, one day, eventually wear out. Eventually White men will sin away their days of grace as far as nature is concerned, and nature will condemn Homo Sapiens Candidus to be one of the 99.9% of the species that went extinct… and do you know what? This will be fair. Nature, after consigning whites to extinction will then turn to the Jews, or the Chinese, and they will inherit the earth. As Dr. Robert Morgan points out: it is impossible to save a race that does not want to be saved. The white race has contracted toxoplasmosis—I argue that it contracted this toxoplasmosis from Christianity—and is doing everything in its power to bring about its own destruction.
We all know what has to be done.
Perhaps the reason why I feel such an affinity with Loyalism, these days, is because I recognise that Rome Rule is destroying the country. Carson, Craig et al. were correct to reject the Rome Rule of Ireland. The Roman Church is the primary instigator of population displacement in Ireland, and thus it is the primary genocider of the Irish.
P.S. Some of the sins against the Holy Ghost are obduracy in sin, presumption and opposing the known truth. All three of these sins against the Holy Ghost have been committed by the white race. Another sin against the Holy Ghost in preconciliar Catholicism is despair, but our Führer told us never to despair and to praise victory.
The tenants called me about my visit yesterday to a mini-flat in a prime area of the city. That means I won’t be blogging, except perhaps approving a few comments, in the coming days and weeks until I’m settled back in the capital.
Incidentally, I didn’t let Adunai’s comment go through today because he’s banned, but as compensation I’ll quote his words which he emailed me shortly after my recent trip to Europe:
I would really love a nuclear annihilation of all the cities in Europe, because only a destruction of statehood might give a chance for a spiritual rebirth. Kill all politicians, all media people, all ideology peddlers, all university staffs, literally everyone must die for the functioning of the System to cease. This is my baseline level.
I reiterate what I’ve said several times. The malignant psychosis of today’s white man is such that only an apocalypse could reset the button of his collective unconscious so that the few survivors may regain a primal Lebenskraft.
Beto’s house
I recently complained that in Europe I saw a huge number of non-white people in a West whose new faith seems to be the extinction of the white man. These days I left the town where I live, where the only white person is my dentist, to look for a room in the big capital, where there are still some white people. The hotel where I was staying is near Magdalena Street in Mexico City, where my loved ones used to live. Now that area is a disaster due to the uncontrolled reproduction of Neanderthals.
The greatest outrage to the beautiful street of my memories is that where Magdalena #115, my Uncle Beto’s house, once stood, there is now a car park guarded by nacos.[1] The house was demolished long ago. I mention Uncle Beto in my trilogy, sharing several anecdotes that portray him as the only relative who, as a young man, was a fan of National Socialist Germany. His house was beautiful: the only one where, decades ago, I saw a copy of Mein Kampf in his library. Seeing a hole in place of such a lovely house now ruled by nacos in a hideous, enormous car park that even extends to the other street on the same block, kills a part of my soul in the sense that my past with my loved ones (now almost all deceased or moved away) is part of my soul.
The Mexican capital has deteriorated far more than the European cities I recently visited, as the population growth of the nacos has been exponential. My once beloved Magdalena Street is just one example of what is gradually happening throughout the West.
I suffered greatly trying to find a mini-flat in a privileged area. What a difference with a movie I saw a long time ago, The Day the Earth Stood Still! If instead of nacos, blacks and gooks there were only whites, as in that 1951 film, it would be possible to find room and board in a house as decent as the one that the alien Mr Carpenter, whose image appears at the beginning of this post, saw when he was looking for shelter:
But in the same film, which I recently rewatched on YouTube, we see the cause of that demographic catastrophe that has already destroyed the best neighbourhoods of the Mexican capital, and is destroying Europe. In one scene, looking at the great statue of the Lincoln Memorial in Washington, D.C., Mr Carpenter tells the boy that Lincoln ‘must have been a great man’.
Therein lie the Christian roots, as talking about Lincoln Dr Robert Morgan has so often pointed out in the comments section of The Unz Review, of the current replacement of whites by coloureds. If Christian ethics hadn’t taken hold of the soul of the white man, or if Hitler had won the war as my uncle Beto wanted, perhaps his decent house would still exist instead of the Dantesque hell I encountered yesterday while walking through Magdalena Street.
By the way, I will be absent from blogging again during the days when I move, once more, to the capital.
____________
[1] In Mexico a naco is a person vulgar or uneducated, regardless of economic status, although it is often used as a racial slur.
I was worried about you, there, but it turns out that you had taken a trip to the Vaterland.
Here is an interesting short from woke atheist, Rebecca Watson.
‘When I lost belief in God, I didn’t loose belief in anything else.’
I.e. the Christian axiology.
She says, further, that as soon as she lost belief in God she immediately became a humanist. As Revilo P. Oliver points out: humanism is merely atheistic Christianity.
When someone believes in the Christian god, their equalitarianism is anchored to the mores of the 1st-century C.E. Their equalitarianism is tethered to the conservative Jewish culture that gave us Saul and Jesus. However, when one stops believing in the Judeo-Christian god, “but not anything else”, then this equalitarianism remains and goes hyper. It is no longer tethered to the Conservative Jewish society that spawned Saul and Jesus. It thus goes hyper. Your “red-giant” analogy is brilliant. Woke atheism is merely a godless Christianity that has lost its supernatural core. In the same way that a red giant goes hyper, so does Neo-Christianty. The equalitarianism of Christianity slips away from its 1st-century Jewish moorings, and becomes a monster, or red giant, or red ogre, perhaps!
Sincerely,
Gaedhal
Thank you for your email. I’m sorry to hear you are in such abject unhappiness. I hope returning to your childhood area helps you. I grew up on the outskirts of a tiny, picturesque country village. I don’t know if it would let me down these days if I returned and examined it in adult detail, but all I remember from then are miles of bright cornfields and flower meadows, horses, and fields of cows, the scent of manure, and wood smoke, and plenty of butterflies. It’s a shame the atmosphere inside my family home did not match the delightful pastoral exterior, at least not for very long. Still, it’s good therapy to extricate yourself from what sounds like a nightmare town. As an honorary ‘country person’ I’ve never liked living in cities or towns much. I can’t imagine what it would feel like to live in an area with no white faces. I imagine it would make me paranoid, as if they were ‘closing in’. I look at the classic illustrations of Rome in about 400-500 AD, totally decayed and vulgar, fallen to pieces, and terribly depressing, and I think of our countries these days.
As with myself, I know you are betting on a currency collapse to aid your financial situation. I often feel I have let myself down by not having a job which could provide for us ([my girlfriend] and myself, but also donations), but then I remember that I was at various university courses until age 26, then spent longer than a decade after that in regular psychosis which only really went into remission once I wrote my books (and with the trial out of the way), and I remember that, on this account, I’ve simply been too busy/ill. I wish I could help you out more financially. None of my myriad self-employment creative efforts ever sell.
I was shocked by Europe. True, the buildings and statues were awe-inspiring, especially compared with the slum of Britain, but it was simply eye candy, and, when placed in context with the degenerate soullessness of the natives, somehow garish, and totally empty. A decent civilization requires decent quality people. I was surprised more did not comment on your report.
That’s the long-term problem with your site—it’s erudite, and intensely detailed, and high-brow (and challenging both intellectually and ethically) unlike the stale, pop journalist circle-jerk of Unz for example, or the smug hipster pretension of C-C. You know what you get there. I imagine it’s like cocaine to them, their daily slew of bland articles. Ego-stroking prolefeed, to do no more than delay vast numbers, and keep them vegetating in their echo-chamber. I should rephrase: the problem is not your site, it’s that people are idiots. I’m left waiting for the likes of Walsh to get out of prison so they can come back to commenting (although I imagine he’ll be monitored pretty tightly in aftermath).
I re-read your PDF booklet on American racialism recently. I didn’t realise there were so many small NS movements, all highly unsuccessful. It seemed to go in cycles. I noticed that the hardest point is always finding, recruiting, and holding onto people. It’s like NS is on the whole dead, somehow. The British Movement disappointed me terribly recently. It seems I was right—this country has no National Socialist presence. It’s just scores of bourgeois dissident rightists here and there, some with swastika paraphernalia, and fat, football hooligan punks.
I have to go shortly, I have a health appointment. I’ll write more later.
Best regards,
Ben
