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Tag: Trauma model of mental disorders

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Narcissism Psychology

Narcissism, 3

I would not have fully understood Marco without noticing that there were a considerable number of YouTube channels talking about narcissism. But there is a fundamental flaw in all of them. Unlike Silvano Arieti’s treatise which helped me so much to understand serious mental disorders (my summary here), these youtubers don’t illustrate their knowledge with specific cases. Perhaps they do so out of cowardice, as there are quite a few people like Marco in the world. They don’t even have to use real names but pseudonyms, so why they don’t use real-life cases to illustrate their theories is a mystery.

Quite independently of such an obvious flaw, I was impressed that these youtubers say that the malignant narcissist can be distinguished by his or her lack of empathy. As we saw in the previous post, Marco showed me off his cobwebbed house that reminded me of vampire castles without noticing that I watched in horror as the thick layer of dust also covered the armchairs in his living room. In fact, I had to turn over one of the cushions of one of his armchairs so that I could sit in his living room and not get dust on my trousers. To show off his house to me without realising that I was horrified, is to lack the most basic empathy.

Youtubers also talk a lot about the gratuitous rage of narcissists, who explode at the drop of a hat. As we also saw, Marco exploded in anger when the taxi driver and I couldn’t easily find his house without a street number. These youtubers also talk about paranoia, which I witnessed in that September call last year with his claim that his relatives craved to steal his house. Another thing the youtubers say that portrays Marco is that those who suffer from malignant narcissism have fluid contours in their ego, so they treat people as egoic objects. This is so surreal that I must illustrate it with an anecdote.

In the previous entry I had promised to explain why we didn’t meet in a mall last year. The answer is that Marco had told me he would meet me outside a restaurant. However, given the unpunctuality of Mexicans, I have been in the habit of meeting them inside a restaurant on my appointments. This allows me to bring a book and entertain myself if the Mexican in question is unpunctual. I told Mexican Marco a couple of times that I would wait for him inside the restaurant. In a Sam Vaknin video I saw yesterday, he said that the narcissist only registers what you say if it goes along with the narcissist’s narrative. It seems incredible, but even in something as prosaic as the location during an appointment Marco didn’t hear what I said more than once: he heard his original voice that he would look for me outside the restaurant.

The result was that we didn’t meet. It was very frustrating in that, although Mexico City is as large as Houston, with fifteen million more people and far fewer freeways it is very difficult to get around. I chose a Sunday for the appointment at the mall far north of the city because there is not much traffic on Sundays and the taxi driver only made an hour’s drive along a freeway from my house to the mall. Marco had arrived by public transport, so it took him an hour and a half to get to the mall. Counting the return trip for both of us, it was five hours of wasted transport, plus the hour and a half wasted in the mall thinking we had both been stood up. All because Marco didn’t want to register in his mind what I told him: that I would wait for him sitting down, inside the restaurant.

A trivial case you might say, but perfect to explain what it means to treat others as egoic objects: the will of the other guy becomes invisible, and one only deals internally with one’s own will, despite the calamity that Marco had to suffer (Perinorte, the mall referred to, is very notorious because the cell phone signal there is very poor, so we couldn’t communicate when we were in and out of the restaurant). But what causes a ‘narcissism’ that it is not even possible to convey such a simple idea as that we will wait for a friend inside a restaurant?

Thanks to the visit of Marco’s first cousin at my house, who had known him since he was a small child, I tied up some loose ends. I already knew that Marco had been raised by a slightly mentally retarded mother, who apparently had been raped: Marco’s absent father. What I didn’t know, and only learned from what the cousin told me, was that Marco had been raised exclusively by his mother. (Before his visit, I had been left with the idea that an aunt and grandmother, in addition to his mother, had been Marco’s guardian figures; I didn’t know that, from an early age, the mother had migrated from some villages to the capital, where Marco grew up.)

Now that single mothers are in vogue in the West, it is becoming clear what havoc some of them wreak on their offspring, especially boys, who have never had a father figure to attach themselves to. Marco, according to his cousin, suffered an absolute mental breakdown the day his mother died, to the extent that his cousin had to make all the arrangements for her funeral and burial while Marco was mentally blocked. I conjecture that this is when Marco’s depression began, as there was no longer the real source where the mother’s only child could settle accounts.
 

The schizophrenogenic mother

The word schizophrenogenic, which I abbreviate to schizogenic, never appears in the videos of the youtubers who talk about malignant narcissism. It doesn’t even appear in Vaknin’s videos when he openly blames those mothers who undermine the individuation process of their children. I sometimes use the term because it inverts the values of biological psychiatry to the trauma model of mental disorders. (Anyone who has not read what I have written about psychiatry in Daybreak, and still believes that psychiatry is a science, might now read ‘From the Great Confinement to chemical Gulag’ on pages 105-127 of my book.)

Once we reject biological psychiatry and see it for what it is, a pseudo-science, it is easier to see that Vaknin fails by using so many diagnostic categories. I reject not only biological psychiatry, but the hundreds of diagnostic categories of psychiatrists and even clinical psychologists. The reason for this is simple. Even in the videos of Vaknin, who uses a plethora of diagnostic categories, it is clear that sometimes a subject deteriorates from a basically neurotic narcissism into a psychotic one where Vaknin already uses terms like ‘mood disorder’ and even ‘schizoid’. In other words, unlike somatic diseases where a heart condition doesn’t degenerate into a condition of, say, the thighs, in mental disorders everything is very fluid. Contrary to psychiatric claims, neuroses, which even normal people generally suffer from, can degenerate into psychosis (what happened to poor Marco).

What Vaknin does get right in his videos is that the infant internalises the gaze of his mother. When the infant is mistreated by a mother, he cannot say that the mother is bad but blames himself because of a sort of Stockholm syndrome (cf. these pages of my book Day of Wrath). The schizogenic mother, from the fluid contours of her ego, sends her infant an unconscious message: I cannot love you as you are; only when you suppress your individuality, your desires, your will that doesn’t agree with mine and your independence and separation from me. I love you not as a separate entity but as part of me forever, symbiosis, womb: mother and child forever united.

With this engulfing behaviour, the child’s internalised morality begins to turn towards self-denial. The infant seems to internalise a message: To function not only in the family, but in society at large, I mustn’t be myself. Thus the future narcissist begins to be engendered, someone with fluid contours of his ego with the environment. If mother rejects me, it is because I am a bad, spoiled, stupid, ugly child. Some psychologists call this a ‘bad object’ and this object, because it is so bad, has to be expelled. Thus the child projects this bad object, externalises it and turns himself into its antithesis, what some call ‘split’. By projecting it outwards the child purges the bad object from himself, cleanses himself; but at the cost of projecting it onto others.

Marco’s cousin cried when, suffering from paranoia that he and his son wanted to steal his second house, enraged, Marco ran him out of his main house. What the cousin ignores is that Marco has internalised the bad object instilled in him by his mother and now wants to expel it symbolically, by projecting it onto others. What many youtubers call ‘narcissistic abuse’ is nothing more than the unravelling of this long-standing, unresolved dynamic with the real mother.

When a narcissist is confronted with a relative who really loves him or her, like Marco’s first cousin, the narcissist doesn’t know how to cope. It was very stressful for him. Paradoxically, he perceives this love, now really brotherly love (not like the manipulative love of his mother) as manipulation and mistreatment. This sibling love is perceived as dangerous, and the narcissist falls apart and resorts to so-called narcissistic abuse: treating the cousin precisely as he couldn’t treat his biological mother because, as an infant, he was one hundred per cent at her mercy.

But why such a twisted dynamic, in which the grown-up narcissist then tries to act out theatrically with other adults? Because the infant had been conditioned to associate love with betrayal. When the infant, who will become a narcissist, is confronted day by day with this mixture of love and all the negative emotions of the devouring mother—shame, fear, guilt, anger, frustration—he learns to associate love with these negative affects. The abused infant seems to internalise the following: Love is bad, it means that I will be betrayed. Even an eighteen-month-old infant who is treated with this sort of behaviour already feels anger about it. But given the absolute power the mother has over him, he internalises that it is illegitimate to be angry with her. It’s even dangerous. So getting angry with mom must be buried in the mind. But what happens to the infant who buries his emotions?

The anger is internalised as long as it can’t be directed towards mom. The child redirects it to himself. But anger redirected to the internal self, rather than to the original source, transmutes into depression: which is what has happened to Marco since his mother died, with his house so spider-webbed that it reminded me of Nosferatu’s. Just compare what Marco did with his mind with my Hojas susurrantes, the first chapter of which is entitled ‘Letter to mom Medusa’ where I direct the anger outwards, towards the original perpetrators. That’s why I never suffer from depression! In contrast to the vindictive autobiographer, depression is a form of self-directed aggression (see ‘On Depression’, pages 27-41 of my book Daybreak).

And compare also what I do literarily with what Marco advised me: to stop writing my autobiographical books and forget about the past! The very Christian Marco is simply following the accepted wisdom: forgive and forget. But since the unconscious can’t be fooled, look at how my old buddy ended up: mad as a hatter! In other words, not only Christian values must be transvalued as far as Hitler and National Socialism are concerned, but also the Christian ethics of forgiveness, and the Judeo-Christian commandment to honour one’s parent whatever she or he does. Marco, who offended me in his last phone call by subtly advising me to join a Christian church went the opposite way and, as Vaknin says in one of his videos, that can lead to schizoid depression: which is exactly what happened to him.

See for example the five minutes from this point in another of his videos, and especially what he says after minute seventeen when he talks about the work with children of Margaret Mahler, who said: ‘Interpersonal relationships become internalised within the ego, or the self’. Mahler also said that what we call the ego or the self is simply a reflection of our relationships with others, and that all mental illnesses are related to interpersonal problems. It is an important video that Vaknin uploaded twice with different titles. And here Vaknin uses a word I’ve used a lot on this site, introject, about which I’ll say a few things in my next post.

Categories
Narcissism Psychiatry Psychology

Narcissism, 1

A diabolical idea occurred to me today.

You may recall that last month I discussed Sam Vaknin in my short posts ‘Mr Darcy’ and ‘Five Minutes’ in the context of what is now fashionable to label ‘narcissism’ on various YouTube channels. I would prefer the term ‘malignant egomania’ or something along those lines, but there are so many videos on various YouTube channels that if I want any traffic to flow to my opinion on the subject, I have no choice but to use the popular expression.

As I have already said, the fundamental flaw of all these channels is that they expose the subject academically, without concrete examples; and they rarely talk about ‘narcissistic’ parents, those suffering from malignant egomania: a condition that compels them to destroy the minds of their children.

The correct way to expose this pathology would be, in the ancient world, as it was done in Greek tragedy: where tragedies were events of a family, even if they used fictitious characters. It is also possible to use real-life people. Those who have read Stefan Zweig’s The Struggle with the Daimon about the Germans Hölderlin, Kleist and Nietzsche will know that it was a tragedy that Kleist burned his History of My Mind before committing suicide. That missing work would, it seems, have marked the beginning of an authentic depth psychology—unlike the epistemological error that reigns in the universities (for example, the Jew Vaknin pays obeisance to the Jew Freud, whom we have roundly exposed on this site).

True depth psychology, which I conjecture would have begun with Kleist, would begin with those who devised the trauma model of mental disorders. Before that, all we had about tormented souls was Zweig’s approach, illustrating it with 19th-century biographical cases. More evolved is to enter the world whose door Alice Miller opened in the second half of the 20th century.

Since, unlike the YouTubers, I have entered the world whose door Miller opened for us (cf. my trilogy), the diabolical idea I came up with means analysing the former friend I talk about in ‘Mr Darcy’ to illustrate what malignant egomania is. In this way I circumvent, one hundred per cent, the fundamental flaw of every vlogger who talks about it: none of them dares to give concrete examples through life cases of real people!

It could be objected that this has nothing to do with the darkest hour of the West. I differ because biography and history are two sides of the same psychological coin. The ethnosuicidal psychosis from which virtually all Western Aryans currently suffer must be analysed. And to solve inexact problems (not mathematical, computational or chess problems), it is important to limit the scale of the problem to avoid confusing ourselves: what has happened to the mental health professions, especially psychiatry (my original contribution to the unmasking of this pseudo-science can be read here). Only then can we hope to solve our inexact problem, or at least come closer to a theoretical solution.

Instead of a pretentious (and failed) metahistorical work like Oswald Spengler’s, limiting the scale means simply understanding ourselves and our neighbours to, from this limited scale, jump into trying to solve the white man’s ethnosuicidal passion. Youtubers cannot do this because they aren’t even able to use the real names of their parents and close ones, as I do in my books.

Whoever criticises his father with his real name will be able to criticise anyone. However, as the person I have analysed is still alive, I will only use his first name, omitting his surnames. (I use the plural because in the Spanish-speaking world not only the father’s surname is used, but also the mother’s. For example, the current president of Mexico is known by his surnames ‘López Obrador’.)

As soon as I can start the series, I will do so, and I will show how understanding a particular case of narcissism can help us to understand the crazy West that, after 1945, only thinks of ethnosuicide.

Categories
Psychohistory

Five minutes

I know that the trauma caused by abusive parents, such as what happened to Walsh, who is serving a prison sentence, is not a topic that is discussed in racialist forums. However, it is fundamental to understanding certain notable personalities of American racialism. James Mason, for example, much admired by Walsh, confesses that he left his parents’ house as a teenager. But he omits the reasons for his running away. No wonder that, after he abandoned his bulletin for would-be revolutionaries, he became engrossed in theological distractions (see my very brief post yesterday, that alludes to my piece ‘Dark Night of the Soul’). Without processing the pain of our childhoods or adolescence, we can lose our minds.

On Saturday, in the ‘Mr Darcy’ comment thread, I was talking about Prof Sam Vaknin. One of the things Lloyd deMause observed in his psychohistorical studies is that the most monstrous gods of the cultures of the historical past (e.g. the Aztecs) had to do with equally monstrous forms of ancient childrearing. I devote the central section of my book Day of Wrath to this topic. But if a casual visitor would only want to listen, in five minutes, to a presentation of this idea in a lecture to a Budapest audience, I would suggest listening to Vaknin for those five minutes from this point to minute 46.

At least Walsh accepted that his mother abused him long ago. That means his mind has redemption if he does introspective work in the years he will suffer in prison. On the other hand, what impresses me most about a couple of banned commenters, is that they have buried parental abuse to the degree that they lack proper empathy to the point that they can’t grasp why, for trolling our sites, they can be banned here and elsewhere.

Categories
Psychiatry Psychology

Unprocessed commenters

As you might have guessed from my post yesterday, ‘Mr Darcy’, that entry was an oblique reference to a commenter who, despite my warnings years ago, believed I had an obligation to answer all his questions.

Recently I’ve written here about other Englishmen I dealt with personally on my last trip to London, who this month were imprisoned in their country, basically for thoughtcrime. But I didn’t tell the whole story in the case of one of them, Tyrone Patten-Walsh, who used to comment here under the name Joseph Walsh.

In the middle of last year, Walsh posted a couple of comments on The Unz Review that are worth quoting. The abysmal difference between a person like me, who entered the racialist world after half a century of existence—having used decades of my life to process the trauma my parents caused when I was a teenager—, and those racialists who had a similar life but never processed their traumas, is discovered in these comments. Last year Walsh wrote:

I’m still here Cesar, still watching, still observing. My re-trial begins next Monday the 5th of June. Obviously I hope not to go to prison but I don’t care if I do. The media reported on my trial last summer here and here.

I took great joy in the prosecution terming me and my co-defendant “unapologetic white supremacists”. Actually I’m an Anglo-Saxon supremacist. German supremacism and Nordic supremacism are for those lower down the hierarchy of mankind.

I know if I go to prison I’ll likely be greeted by white cowards who’ll be taking a beating from their Black and Muslim superiors. Blacks and Muslims have racial pride and blend racial and religious pride with criminal activity and domination of prisons. White males in UK prisons seem to not be able to do this, predictably. In American prisons there IS a combination between White Supremacy and crime, fortunately. What seems the logical thing to do to me is to use the prison system as a foundation for dominating the streets. Use the most secure prisons as headquarters for dominating the prison system and then monopolize crime on the streets. But white cowards have long ago consented to their streets (and prisons) being controlled by Third World criminal gangs.

Never mind. The white race can go to hell for all I care. I’ve saved myself and that’s what matters. Even if the white race does survive, it’s apparent to me that humanity is going nowhere. We’re a hopeless species. A doomed species. There never was any hope for mankind. Never was, never will be. A silly planet full of silly people leading their silly lives. If only all of humanity could be put in prison to be ‘alone with their thoughts’ then I would feel Justice had been done.

Robert Morgan, another commenter on The Unz Review who, like Walsh, has also never processed his childhood trauma, replied to Walsh with these words:

All the best people go to prison—Socrates, Sade, Hitler. More recently, Joseph Paul Franklin, die Brüder Schweigen, Charles Manson, Ted Kaczynski, Anders Breivik, Brenton Tarrant, and many more, both famous and obscure. Just as steel is tempered to make a better weapon, men are put in prison in order to acquire the necessary hardness.

Morgan is confused: several on his list have little in common with each other. Walsh replied:

Yes. I’ve observed that some of the greatest men of the past one hundred years spent time in prison. I thought Charles Manson’s way of handling his virtually lifelong imprisonment was fantastic, especially his wise insights that “the way out is not through the gate”. I engage in regular correspondence with two former associates of Charles Manson, namely Nikolas Schreck and James Mason. Another one of my favourites was Barry Mills who rose to become the leader of the Aryan Brotherhood prison gang in the American prison system from the 1980s until his death. He ended up enjoying prison, deliberately committing crimes to get back into prison because he could thrive inside there as a highly respected kingpin of organized crime in America.

Ever since my late teenage years I’ve always been fascinated by prison, especially American prisons. I remember watching documentaries about white supremacist prison gangs and loving the ruthlessness of the environment. It’s not an accident that I’ve ended up in trouble with “the Law”. It fits right in with the bigger picture of my life’s destiny. Just under two years ago I and my co-defendant [Chris Gibbons] appeared before a judge at the Old Bailey court in London where William Joyce and John Amery were put on trial, essentially for being part of the same cause as Joyce and Amery, only eight decades further down the line. I’m aware of my individual place and purpose within the big picture of human history as a whole.

Walsh quoted Morgan again:

The torture of prison—the main point of it—is to expose you unremittingly to the depredations of your “fellow man”, and this would be defeated if everyone got his own cell.

And then responded:

I have an associate who spent some time in prisons here in England. He said “The people are the punishment. If you were in there on your own it wouldn’t be a punishment.”

As far as ‘punishment’, I’ve already suffered immensely since I was 17 when I was incarcerated in a mental institute for ‘mental illness’. I’ve spent a year of my life locked up for ‘insanity’ already. I’m used to suffering and I don’t expect mercy from life. Life shows little to no mercy to certain people. Consequently I have become merciless. In fact I’ve come to love the suffering and evil of this planet. As long as humans are suffering justice is being done, that’s what I say. From my teenage years I’ve been obsessed with Satan, Hitler, Charles Manson, Evil, crime, serial killers etc.

Here we see the great cognitive distortion in Walsh’s perspective. What he says sounds much more like ‘Hollywood Hitler’ than the historical Hitler whose biography we have begun to ponder, at a snail’s pace but I will try to ponder it through the book by another Englishman, Brendan Simms. Walsh continues:

If I do go to prison I imagine I should feel right at home. It’s part of being a revolutionary, an outlaw. When I was younger the British state termed my thoughts and words ‘insane’, now my words and thoughts are ‘illegal’ haha. I’ve been termed bipolar, schizoaffective, autistic, Asperger, a terrorist, far right etc. by the usual psychological ‘experts’. I’m sure you can imagine my life’s story Dr. Morgan. It’s the same story lived by thousands of other ‘dangerous males’ all across the West.

I’ll finish with an amusing anecdote. Ten years ago Carolyn Yeager interviewed Tom Metzger and Metzger was talking about the Jews’ collective will to power. Carolyn asked Metzger “Where’s our will to power?” and Metzger paused for a split second then said, “They’re all in prison”. Yeager was appalled by Terrible Tommy’s statement and said “Oh, come on.” I wouldn’t have expected her to understand but Metzger most certainly did lol.

Thanks for your [Morgan] words of support anyway.

All this stuff about Satan, Manson, serial killers and so on is nothing but extremely dense mental darkness: a ‘paleological’ way of dealing with trauma (see my book Day of Wrath).

One example will suffice. When I was in his flat in London, I realised that Walsh was suffering from akathisia because of the drug the pseudoscientific psychiatrists had prescribed for him. But Walsh apparently ignored my advice, even though he started watching a Robert Whitaker video about these drugs that I had recommended on YouTube. (Whitaker was awarded the Pulitzer Prize for a series of articles questioning the ethics of psychiatric research.) Despite my offering to advise him on psychiatry and family trauma, Walsh went his own way: a way that we might call, as Krist Krusher does, the way of the ‘Siege-tards’ in reference to James Mason’s Siege (see Krusher’s indented quote in this post).

In July 2019 I tried to communicate these ideas to Walsh. But he got angry calling me a mongrel, etc., instead of answering my simple question: Is Charles Manson good for Hitler’s 88 words?

What to think of the Walsh case and others like him? One thing is certain: It is not possible to save the white race from an insane asylum or prison. It’s a shame that when WordPress Inc., cancelled my The West’s Darkest Hour account it was very difficult to retrieve articles and comments; and a heated discussion from a January 2019 post in the old incarnation of this site—a discussion about Charles Manson precisely—didn’t make it in the move to this new incarnation. But it is clear from what is linked above that Walsh didn’t attempt, in July of that same year, to answer my question: in what sense was Charles Manson useful to the fourteen words?

Unlike an internally processed man like me, who no longer suffers from any neurosis (let alone psychosis!), three smart commenters on that January 2019 thread, including Walsh, suffered psychic breakdowns in admiring this prisoner who has nothing to do with Hitler’s ideals.

Hopefully, Walsh will use his next seven years in prison to heal his troubled soul like Solzhenitsyn, instead of going the way of the Siege-tards. I have a hunch that Chris Gibbons, the other Englishman I met in London who got one more year in prison than Walsh, also for thoughtcrime, will have a better chance of processing his soul as Solzhenitsyn did.

Categories
Narcissism Pride & Prejudice

Mr Darcy

Or:

‘My good opinion once is lost, it’s lost forever’

I feel I should add something to what I said on Tuesday in the post ‘Empathy’, which must be read to understand the present entry. Studying a case, as in my diaries I did with the former chess friend who suffers from such extreme narcissism that he became friendless, and studying the mad West that wants to ethno-suicide itself, are two sides of the same coin: biography and history.

Given that the spirit of Europe in general and Germany in particular was crushed by the Anglo-Americans after World War II, and that because of these Anglo-Americans the Jews were astronomically empowered, it irritates me that the most lucid minds on the trauma model of mental disorders that I have come across are Jewish. For example, in my books, I mention a lot Swiss Alice Miller and the Italian-American Silvano Arieti. If Hitler had won the war, the psychologists who would have made the findings that Arieti and Miller eventually did would have been Aryans.

This morning I watched this interview of a woman with an Israeli émigré to Europe, Sam Vaknin, and I was struck that what the Israeli says is almost a carbon copy of what, in my copious diaries, I have written about the chess player who, after decades of not dealing with him, I visited only once at his home. From that video and many others that can be seen on YouTube, one can guess that narcissism is a pattern of behaviour that is beginning to be analysed in social media, although Vaknin wrote an academic book on the subject.

Despite being a Jew, for those interested in how a mother without ‘psychological childbirth’ can spoil her child in such a way as to prevent the normal process of individuation as a grown-up, so that the ‘narcissist’ is emotionally left with the mind of a two-year-old, the above-linked interview is worth watching. But I reiterate that I would have loved for the good guys to have won WW2 so that all these findings would have been popularised from Aryan, not Jewish, research.

The findings of Arieti, Miller and now this guy, Vaknin, are valid regardless of the ethnic group they belong to, just as John von Neumann was an outstanding scientist in another area, computer science. It was because of Neumann, by the way, that many years ago I learned that chess was not a game, but a special form of computation.

What’s this all about?

In the past, a banned commenter kept posting comments that went right to the spam filter and even kept sending me emails. I didn’t even read them. As Mr Darcy said in Pride & Prejudice, once a person lets him down, that person will let him down forever as Mr Darcy never gave a second chance.

I don’t give a second chance either because life is short, and The West’s Darkest Hour is not a forum for people like the former chess friend or others like him. If, unlike Vaknin, they don’t want to do psychological healing work, that’s their problem. And I don’t mean going to a psychiatrist or a clinical psychologist (they’ll never help you!), but to do some soul-searching; to remember how the devouring mother didn’t let us grow up, and to write down every painful anecdote of our childhood, puberty and adolescence.

Generally, people damaged by their parents don’t do this work, so once such a person disappoints me, like Mr Darcy I walk away from him or her forever. I did that not only with the former chess friend I cut off last month but also with people I have met through the internet.

Categories
Narcissism

Empathy

I think tomorrow I will continue the series on Simms’ book on Hitler, but I wanted to talk about something else tonight.

Not long ago I visited a former friend with whom I used to play chess several decades ago and saw him so deteriorated that I wrote many pages in my journal about him. These days I’ve been watching YouTube videos about malignant narcissism that, in addition to profiling former friends like this guy, portrayed my late mother’s personality.

Since I am adding a final chapter to the third book of my trilogy, related to her death and its family consequences, I will not continue the translation of the previous two volumes before that third book is completed in my native language: something that doesn’t depend on me, but on how the random situation in which I find myself unfolds. (I may soon travel to the south of the country looking for some cheaper housing than the high prices of the capital.)

I consider intuitive psychology, something not taught in universities, to be my forte. So in this post I’d like to talk about something related to both the aforementioned former friend and my late mother.

Empathy is not the same as sympathy or even compassion. We can empathize even with someone who wants to kill us, in the sense of picking up on his vibes, reading his mind and warning us. What I see as serious with the people mentioned above is that they are practically devoid of empathy. They treat us as ‘egoic’ objects in the sense that they cannot perceive us as entities with a will of their own, but rather project their psychological structures onto us.

The big flaw I see in the YouTube videos on malignant narcissism is that it isn’t the same thing to stop seeing, say, that guy from the chess club with whom I played decades ago after a new encounter, as it is for the child to leave his narcissistic mother or father who is undermining his soul. They are entirely different things, in that on one, as adults, we have the power to make a clean break and on the other, the child has no power to walk away from the toxic parent.

In a way I envy Tyrone, who now rots in jail in an Orwellian UK, because his formerly abusive mother at least tried to apologise to him, even telling him to read Alice Miller: the intuitive psychologist who saved me in 2002, as I recount in the first volume of my trilogy.

Someone who hasn’t processed his grief with a schizogenic mother, as the chess friend, is doomed to a perennial depression in which he wants to drag others into his maelstrom. And I don’t think anyone who has had extremely toxic parents who omits to write his most painful memories, even if that enterprise takes decades (as in my case), can heal his soul.

Unless I die first—I would like to live another thirty years!—the time will come when I will use this site not only to announce my autobiographical books that I will be translating into English, but to discuss their content and even detail issues that don’t appear in the trilogy. It is a thousand times easier to save the Aryans from extinction if one knows oneself because the psychological traps into which the racialists fall, for example what I was saying yesterday in ‘The Gatekeepers’, can be overcome by pure autobiographical insight.

Categories
Axiology Film William Shakespeare

Hamlet

Of my list of fifty, this was the first film that, as I recount in my autobiography, really made an impression on me when I saw it on television in 1975, with my dad by my side. Precisely in trying to understand how a defect or fault in my father’s character corrupted the whole family dynamics, years later I would ponder much in the words that, in Laurence Olivier’s voice, we listen at the beginning of Hamlet (1948 film):

So oft it chances in particular men
That for some vicious mole of nature in them,
By the o’ergrowth of some complexion,
Oft breaking down the pales and forts of reason,
Or by some habit grown too much; that these men–
Carrying, I say, the stamp of one defect,
Their virtues else — be they as pure as grace,
Shall in the general censure take corruption
From that particular fault.

As a teenager watching it at home, I was most impressed by Hamlet’s inward-spiralling soliloquies in one of the early scenes, when he is left alone in the hall and the court guests leave. If instead of the forty-year-old actor Olivier, the director had cast a teenage actor of my age—as he appears in Shakespeare’s tragedy!—I would have connected much more with the character. But even so, his soliloquies near the beginning of the film made a big impression on me because that is what I used to do as a teenager, and precisely because of a family tragedy that no one but me seemed to have any introspection about.

However, it is impossible to critique the film without critiquing not only Shakespeare, but the Christian era of which both Shakespeare and I are a part.

As Alice Miller observed in one of her books, the Judeo-Christian commandment to honour the parent has been fatal to the mental health of Christians (and I would add, of atheistic neo-Christians alike). Although Christians destroyed the vast majority of the classical world’s plays, tragedies and comedies, in the little that remains it can be seen that in both Iphigenia and Electra it’s clear that there is maddening mistreatment of their children by their parents. But not in Hamlet where an uncle is the bad guy. Nevertheless, for the Elizabethan period Hamlet was a breakthrough in the right direction, although millennia earlier the Greeks had already reached the marrow of the human soul. In sum, for the time Hamlet definitely represented a leap forward to a more self-conscious self.

Another thing that, now grown up, struck me when I rewatched the film was the character of Ophelia when Hamlet wants to grab her: the personification of the eternal feminine that I’ve been talking about on this site, which also appears in Shakespeare when we listen: ‘In her excellent white bosom, these…’ Hamlet’s scenes with Ophelia in the castle should be paradigmatic of how women will be in the future ethnostate, and are worth seeing. But back to what I said above.

Whites won’t mature as long as they are trapped by Judeo-Christian commandments. Even in areas as distinct from racial preservation as mental disorders (in Shakespearean tragedy we read that the teenage Hamlet was said to be deranged), we can never understand each other unless we transvalue our values to the values of the times of the Greek tragedies. Back then, before the commandment to honour our parents, it was easy to see that Clytemnestra’s mistreatment had affected the mental health of her daughter Electra; or that Iphigenia’s sacrifice by Agamemnon had affected Clytemnestra terribly, and so on. Even the tough Spartans wept at these open-air tragedies when they visited Athens because they reflected what was happening in the real world.

So much do Christian ethics permeate the secular world that even in his Dictionnaire philosophique Voltaire says that ‘It is natural for children to honour their parents’, and the so-called mental health professionals of our times feel the same way. In our century, the Judeo-Christian injunction to honour the parent, now secularised, moves writers to shift the villain of the story, for example from father to uncle as in Harry Potter (and Hamlet!) and only through such a shift is audio-visual drama permitted.

To transvalue all values is to recognise that the tragedies of the classical world were more profound and direct than the indirect tragedies of our Christian era. And even though Shakespeare, like Montaigne, set religion aside in their writings, they still moved on the axiological scale of our age, where the mandate to honour the parent is so profound that there is a whole fraudulent profession, psychiatry, which tries to keep the parental figure out in the cases of traumatised children and adolescents at home (cf. my books in Spanish).

Categories
Autobiography

Covington

Last Friday I said: ‘I discovered the racial right forums very late in life, after my fiftieth birthday.’ Then I added that the first decades of my intellectual life had been devoted to knowing myself, following the Delphic injunction. To understand The West’s Darkest Hour it is essential never to lose sight of where I come from.

An individual who comes from extreme self-knowledge looks at the structure of the inner self. When I finished studying the authors who helped me understand highly dysfunctional families, I realised that they only represented part of the psychological healing process of coming from one of these families.

In the post a week ago I also mentioned Stefan Molyneux, who was abused by his Jewish mother, something Molyneux confessed to in some of his videos. But what I liked is that in one of his videos Molyneux added that when he left home and saw the world, he realised that the Western world was as crazy as his mother. So true, although because of his Jewish ancestry, Molyneux never wanted to address the JQ in his videos. He was never a philosopher of integrity, nor did he ever know himself deeply.

When I discovered white nationalism I realised that my self-image and self-esteem hadn’t only been undermined by mistreatment at home but that contemporary Western society had made me, like the rest of Western men, lose my manhood. Compare the Germans of today, overwhelmed with feelings of false guilt, with the Prussian military of former times! And the same can be said of the rest of Westerners.

Well, when I imbibed white nationalism in 2010, the therapy that restored my once-lost manhood was William Pierce’s The Turner Diaries and the Harold Covington quartet (Covington hadn’t yet written the fifth novel in his saga). It was because of this that I was originally blind to Covington’s character flaws, which I would only learn about in later years. But while I share everything Hadding Scott has written about Covington’s shenanigans, that doesn’t detract from the fact that devouring his novels, thirteen years ago now, about the revolutionary creation of an Aryan Republic in America, restored my manhood in the sense that this is how we should act.

If we look at the reactions of Lebanese men this very day to the Hezbollah leader’s speech and compare them with Westerners today, we will understand what I mean by ‘regaining our manhood’ (YouTube has been deleting clips of Hezbollah leader’s speech earlier in the day so I am not linking any clips here).

Of course, an Aryan leader must be the antithesis of Covington, who spent his whole life slandering other racialist leaders in his country. Covington is only to be understood as a novelist, never as a leader of a cause. It reminds me that when I read Gore Vidal’s Julian thirty years ago, I was fascinated by his novel (a novel that every Aryan who wants to reclaim his land should read). But when I started browsing through Vidal’s autobiography in a bookstore, I was disgusted by the pictures of shirtless macho men that Vidal put in there boasting that he had slept with them!

On that level, Covington’s biography also disappoints. But I can’t deny that both his quartet and Vidal’s novel about Julian the Apostate gave me back a part of me that society had stolen from me.

Several white nationalist essayists have written about Covington in Counter-Currents and The Occidental Observer. The most recent essay was published this September and October and can be read in three parts here, here and here. In that essay, we can see that the proofreader of his novels wrote:

Harold grew up in Burlington, North Carolina in a semi-upper class family, at least by Tarheel standards, but his childhood was troubled. His father was abusive and unstable. Harold learned to maneuver around him, and his brother had his own emotional difficulties. He was stern about not wanting to dwell on his childhood, however, saying that he’d spent the previous three decades trying to forget it, so much so that he scorned the idea of writing memoirs: “I have no intention of going back there and wallowing in the mud for the titillation of Morris Dees, armchair Jewish psychologists, and other such slimy voyeurs. So there will be no My Life In A Looney Bin by Harold A. Covington.”

Therein lay the rub. If Covington, as I did, had dared to put down on paper the details of his hapless childhood, and the problems he had with his abusive father (instead of some vampire novels he wrote), he would have healed psychologically. He wouldn’t have become that mentally dissociated fellow who foolishly believed that, by defaming the leaders of white nationalism, he was going to come out the winner. We have said it before and it bears repeating: Know thyself and you will know the universe and the Gods.

Categories
Autobiography

The narrow door

Sometimes it is good to let a fundamentalist Christian’s comment pass to reply, as I did yesterday and today. However, I would like to clarify a few things that I haven’t made clear on this site.

I discovered the racial right forums very late in life, after my fiftieth birthday. Previously, my intellect was absorbed in trying to unravel the mystery of the psychic havoc that abusive parents wreak on their children, be it a child or a teenager. The result of that research, sometimes autobiographical and sometimes not, was these books written in my mother tongue (I plan to add a final chapter now that my mother has passed away).

Without understanding my first fifty years it is impossible to understand my point of view on this site, and why that point of view differs so much from the common white nationalist, even though we both profess devotion to the fourteen words. The crux of the situation I explain in this post.

It is true that 99.9 per cent of kids who were abused big time at home develop neurotic or even psychotic symptoms. What is not often discussed is that falling into a cult and believing its dogmas (which happened to me in 1978) is also a form of mental derangement. The way I define psychosis differs greatly from how it is defined by psychiatrists, whose profession I consider fraudulent (see pages 105-127 of Daybreak). The way I see psychosis has nothing to do with putative defective genes or putative chemical imbalances. That is bio-reductionist pseudo-science (see pages 21-30 of Day of Wrath).

Many forms of psychosis represent a strong cognitive distortion of the real world, the classic example being a subject who suffers from paranoid delusions of persecution. But if psychosis is a strong cognitive distortion, that means that people who believe in the Abrahamic religions are also in a state of psychosis. As Gaedhal told us in his communication today: ‘There is no empirical evidence that the Christian god exists. Thus, we ought not [speculate about the so-called Trinity] minus an empirical demonstration that God exists. As Rationalwiki points out: discussing the nature of an entity for which there is no empirical evidence is like discussing the colour of the tooth fairy’s dress’.

However, from this angle, all the New Age cults (including Scientology) that have flourished in North America also represent various psychoses, in that their adherents are heavily distorting reality. Ron Hubbard himself was a victim of his mother’s abuse, and instead of autobiographical self-inspection, he elaborated a doctrine inspired by his science-fiction tales that concealed his childhood (see the little book I wrote in Spanish about that cult).

Cognitively I was in very bad shape when I fell into a cult, Eschatology (see pages 11-26 of Daybreak). But thanks to the paranormal sceptics, among whom I include Martin Gardner, I was cured of those dogmas. Unfortunately, most are unable to be cured and remain indefinitely trapped either in the dogmas of a paranormalist cult or of a more conventional religion, among which I include Christianity.

Interestingly, among the racial right, the only one who talked about this subject before YouTube took down his channel was Stefan Molyneux, and remember his sharp analysis of how his mother’s terrible abuse of him as a child drove Charles Manson mad as an adult. In one of his programmes, now deleted, Molyneux said a great truth: that many adults who were abused found in the idea of a personal God a balm for their soul (a sort of substitute Father replacing the abusive father many of us had as children). This unconscious process is something real, but only those who follow the religion of the Delphic Oracle, know thyself, discover these traps of the mind.

Having cleared all this up, the crux of what I was talking about above is the following.

While 99.9 per cent of the reactions to abuse are psychologically dissociative (i.e., neuroses and psychoses), there is a narrow door, to paraphrase the New Testament (Lk 13:24), that leads to even greater mental health than the common man, despite the abuse.

To illustrate this, let us recall that, in evolutionary biology, 99.9 per cent of genetic mutations in a normal organism deteriorate the individual. But there is a fraction that, by pure chance, leads to a better adaptation to the environment: the mutant becomes superior to its peers (imagine, for example, the Australopithecus mutated by touching the monolith in Kubrick’s film).

That is the kind of mutation I talk about in my trilogy, and what I recommend to all those who were martyred at home. But it is the narrow door, very very difficult to find. Almost all the abused go to the wide door: the range of the most serious psychoses—e.g., serial killing and the schizophrenias—to neurotic depressions, addictions, falling into cults or repeating patterns of behaviour with the next generation of children (I even believe that a dude’s perennial homosexuality is a symptom of a strong neurosis).

So when someone points to my abusive past at home to dismiss my ideas he is not only committing an ad hominem fallacy: he is ignoring that a narrow door exists.

I could define this door as an immense development of empathy due to processing past pain (though I don’t mean the crazy empathy of liberals, which I have been calling ‘deranged altruism’). See pages 68-70 of Daybreak, ‘The Ascent of the Soul’, which hits the nail on the head of what I mean by healthy empathy. Interestingly, the following pages of the same book disprove that my worldview is at all pessimistic.

Those books from my Daybreak Press deserve to be edited once again after Lulu, Inc. cancelled my account for my English books. I am a golden ager who barely has time to learn how to design book covers at, say, IngramSpark. If any of my young visitors would like to contribute their work to make my English books available for sale again, please contact me (see the red letters at the top of this page, ‘Contact’).

Categories
Autobiography Child abuse

Don’t transfer your wrath onto Steve!

I have been reproducing most of the text of the article ‘The Holy Hook’.

‘Christianity without the Old Testament?’ is the last section of that essay by Laurent Guyénot. It consists of 900 words. I don’t want to reproduce it here but you can read it in The Unz Review.

In that last section, Guyénot falls into the same errors we have seen time and again in the racial right that desperately wants to save the religion of our parents despite its roots. Since, as we saw in David Skrbina’s book, the New Testament was written by Jews for Gentile consumption, it cannot be sanitised from the point of view of the fourteen words. However, what we have read in the previous instalments of ‘The Holy Hook’ is important to better understand the psyop represented by the forced conversion of the white race to the god of the Jews. But what Guyénot lacked, which Skrbina didn’t lack, was to assimilate the legacy of Nietzsche.

For the rest of this article I would like to talk about issues that I have touched on in recent posts. In the video Gonzalo uploaded today we no longer see him mocking with his typical black humour, because things are getting very ugly in Ukraine, where he is trapped, and perhaps we will see an October surprise before the US mid-term elections next month.
 

The Dahmer case—again!

Another issue I recently touched on and have given some more thought to is the Dahmer case. As you may recall, at the end of last month I confessed that I had watched the miniseries by pressing the forward button to avoid watching the morbid stuff Netflix shows us. But yesterday I saw, without pressing that button, a couple of scenes based on the real-life Dahmer family that caught my attention.

Jeffrey’s father, once with his new wife and the other time right after Jeff was sentenced, blames both his first wife—Jeff’s mother—and himself, for creating a monster because of how Jeff was mistreated as a child. And after the sentence, the mother writes a confession in which she feels guilty about the way she treated her son before turning on the gas tap in an attempt to kill herself. Having pressed the forward button so many times in the past month, I hadn’t thought about this pair of revealing scenes which, as I said, are apparently based on real-life anecdotes.

As a teenager I had, to some extent, a mother like Jeffrey’s, so I know how one internalises the verbal abuse of what Jung called ‘a dragon mother’. What hurt Jeff the most as a child is that his dad, who should’ve been the countervailing force, left him alone with the dragon and literally walked out of the home. It was in that house that Jeff committed his first murder and precisely when his young victim, Steven Mark Hicks (pictured below) wanted to leave the house.

After several hours of talking, drinking and listening to music, Steve ‘wanted to leave and I didn’t want him to leave’. Dahmer struck Steve from behind with the dumbbell while Steve was sitting in a chair. When he fell unconscious, Dahmer choked him to death with the barbell bar.

It seems obvious to me that the eighteen-year-old Jeff displaced pent-up anger towards the father in a sort of ‘Now you’re not leaving!’ From my own experience I know that resentment towards the passive father who didn’t stop the abuse is far more serious than resentment towards the dragon mother, insofar as he could have saved us and did nothing.

Of course, regarding his psychic wounds Jeff’s twist was very different from mine. He began to recreate his impotent rage with scapegoats, starting with Steve, and the betrayal he had been subjected to at home never crossed his conscience (transferred, unconscious hatred is infinite, since it’s not directed toward the real perp). I preferred to leave a legacy to humanity with my autobiographical confessions—see the only comment in the featured post.

Having been watching so many YouTube interviews with the real Jeff Dahmer, I realised that what trauma researchers say is true. To the extent that the subject doesn’t know himself—Jeff didn’t know himself—he will displace his unconscious rage on others. Bringing to consciousness the horrors of our childhoods (or adolescence in my case) prevents mental disorders, or our taking it out on innocent Steves.